Finding Good Men Characteristics of the Alpha Male by Sharon R.

When a girl is drawn to submission, she is met with an extraordinary amount of possibilities. I remember myself what it was like when I first was drawn and tiptoed into the world of BDSM. Delving into this area means being hit by a tsunami of information and propositions. In this sea of "wisdom" I feel there are so many vital things missing that would aid in properly informing and preparing girls for the road ahead. Chief among these things is an emphasis on the importance of being able to recognize a good Master and an authentically dominant Man.

There is no doubt a degree of responsibility that falls on Men to honestly and accurately represent themselves to those who wish to serve them, but that is not to say that a female is without responsibility in regards to choosing whom she serves. As females, I have always thought it's our duty to be familiar with all of the things that set men apart from ourselves. We should have an intimate knowledge of not only their physical features and biology, but of the true qualities of male character and disposition. It would be wise for us to learn these traits, be able to identify them in a male, and seek to only serve those who possess them. With the lack of information and basic training available, I believe we girls get confused quickly, resulting in so many message board and community posts by disillusioned posters trying to figure out what's going wrong in their relationship with Master.

In a perfect world where Natural Order is embraced, we may hope that finding a Man to serve would be simple, but I'm sure I don't need to remind the reader that it is not a perfect world in which we live. That being the case, we must understand that not all those who claim to be Masters are worthy of that claim. It might be fair to say that many "Masters" are inexperienced, misinformed, or worse yet, merely doning the title for a mere sexual romp.

How then do we find a good Master? I would suggest the key to finding a good Master is knowing how to recognize a good Man. This, I believe, is something all females should be schooled in from the time they are very young. Knowing how to recognize a good Man is something we should be trained to recognize. As this is not the case for many girls, it is my hope this article may help equip girls with some basic knowledge to help recognize authentically dominant Males.

Before I begin listing the traits I have come to know as good indicators, I think it's important to pause for a moment and mention the girl's mindset, too. When a girl begins her search for a Master, it is imperative that she first be honest with herself about what she's searching for. Servitude is not something to be taken lightly or to be entered into without a lot of consideration and a great deal of soul searching. It is extremely important for a girl to know her own heart and to be open and honest with herself about what exactly she's seeking. There is a vast difference between a life lived in accordance with Natural Order and that of a person who participates in the anything goes world of BDSM. It behooves us all to take time to consider these differences and to know where our beliefs stand before proceeding into any commitment. Take time to read, research, and, most importantly, know who you are before you begin to search for someone to serve. With that said, let's move on to the Men.

Naturally, every man is different. No two males' temperaments will be quite the same, but I do believe there are some similarities that can be found in good Men. These things can be counted upon as reliable signals as to what sort of Master a man will make. I cannot claim, obviously, to know everything there is to know about finding a good Man, but having the experience of being the daughter of a good Man and serving a good Man now, I believe I've been given a good example of what a good Man is. I watched my Father raise my brother to be a good Man and saw the qualities he worked to instill in him. These traits and qualities, I have found, have been present in every good Man I've encountered and that is why I believe they are reliable keys to recognizing good Men. I do feel it's important to state that not all good Men identify as being dominant, or Masters, though they may, in fact, be naturally dominant men. However, it has been my observation that every good Master is first and foremost a good Man.

This is a list of basic things to look for when distinguishing a man from a Man (the list is in no particular order):

Confidence and Self-sufficiency

Good Men are Men of confidence and self-sufficiency. They approach life with a calm and steady demeanor. They are comfortable with their decisions and actions without relying too heavily upon the opinions of others. A man of true confidence is not one who has to sell himself to you, but rather, simply is who he is.

Integrity

I believe integrity is evidence of a soundness of character that is imperative in a good Man and a good Master.

Cleanliness and Order

This may seem inconsequential to some, but I find it to be very important. A man whose home and other personal spaces are not clean and in disorder is not likely to create order in the life of a female under him. I believe a good Man is one who upholds order in all areas of his life.

Good Grooming

Again, some may consider this of little consequence, or perhaps even superficial, but it has been my understanding that any man of intelligence and class is also one who is aware of how he presents himself to others. He takes care to represent himself well in the way that he speaks and carries himself.

Self Control

I believe this may be one of the most important keys to recognizing a good Man. A good Man and certainly a good Master is one who practices great self control. A man who practices self control is one who is free of addictions and obsessions. He doesn't allow other things to control how he lives or responds, but rather maintains balance in his life. A man who controls himself is one who can be trusted to control the life of his female.

Health and Stewardship

A man who cares for his health and who takes good care of the things that belong to him is a good Man and will make a good Keeper for a female. This is something that should be taken into consideration when choosing to serve a particular Man. As a slave, you place yourself in the care of this person, like any one of his other belongings. It's wise to pay attention to how he cares for those things.

Mental and Emotional Soundness

Throughout this list is a theme of general steadiness and soundness of character recognizable in good Men and Masters. Mental and emotional soundness is very important in potential Masters. In being surrendered to a Master we are making ourselves vulnerable and it is wise to know when we enter into this kind of commitment that the person we are making ourselves vulnerable to is in a position to be a proper keeper and user of that vulnerability. A man who is overly emotional or shows signs of being mentally unstable is probably not the best choice for a Master.

This is simply a list of things that are good to consider when seeking a Man to serve. I believe that if more girls would take the time prior to entering any kind of relationship to honestly consider what is most natural to them and seek Masters who likewise embrace natural order, their inherent position of authority, and exhibit the characteristics of good, stable keepers, we'd see far less confusion and many more content females living happy, productive lives!