The "Barnyard Talk" between the cat and the horse is an inspirational and didactic anecdote. The discussion between these two very different creatures is easily applied to two humans, on two sides of submission. It is a good way to explain that submission is not a bad thing and can actually make some people happy.
However, I do not believe that it is enough to convert someone to the life or to change the mind of someone who does not understand submission, for I feel submission is inborn. It can be taught, and has been in the past, but it is not today!
The reverse is inculcated into the minds of our young girls, so much so that many of them are not aware that submission to a man (or woman) is an alternative and that, because of their equality in human terms, there should be equality in relationship status. Others believe that men are greedy, selfish, boorish creatures who must be run like little boys. (Admittedly some are. There are plenty of men who fall short of the ideal of masculinity, just as there are many females who fail at being feminine. This is the result of a dysfunctional society that has abandoned gender roles.)
But relationships (and people) are more complex than that, and it takes much education and practice nowadays to have successful marriages (to wit, the high divorce rate). Women may think they're happier eschewing and deriding men, emasculating them and "wearing the pants," but the divorce rate shows that most women are not happy. This is because they never understood how to submit their wishes to those of the husband for peace and happiness. This is because it is not taught. Women are not even aware that it is an option.
But in truth it is a spiritual pursuit; the repression of the appetites and impulses is part of a Christian worldview, and the Buddha promoted rejection of desires and attachments. These impulses and appetites are the reason for our suffering. If we could sublimate them, want them less, or give over to someone of greater position and status, we could be happier.
A relationship cannot be a democracy, it must by nature be a dictatorship; one person must make the final call. If it is not the same person all the time, so be it, but better harmony can be achieved if it is, or if the One in charge happens to allow the other to make a decision now and then. This at least keeps Him at the top.
But we must be able to do this internally - mentally - and not just with our actions. If we walk the walk but don't talk the talk, we are only fooling ourselves, and soon it will break down.
In the end, true happiness can only be achieved by being true to ourselves, whether or not others approve. Some of us know early on who we are and what we want, some find out later, some have to be led, but in this day and age it is most difficult to discover this about ourselves or express it if we do realize it.
Like the gays before us, we are the new underground group, and trying to expose or convert others to these ideas is going to be a long and painful journey. Good luck and bless all those in the fray. We fight the good fight.
